This post will provide tips for the connector and the contact in an email introduction. Interestingly, there are not many resources available about how to handle an introduction when you are the contact.
Throughout the post, we’ve added a recent example of where we were the connector for an asker who was looking for a new position. This post will conclude with an example of a great introduction for a mutually beneficial business opportunity (again, we were the connector).
You are the Connector of the Introduction
As the connector, you have an important role to play. While your part seems simple, there are potentially both positive and negative ramifications for you.
1. Consider Your Relationship with the Asker and the Contact
As discussed in the previous post from the asker perspective, as the connector, how strong is your relationship with the asker? While the asker is essentially doing all the work, it’s your reputation that is at risk. Bluntly speaking, would you be potentially embarrassed by the asker? If there is a remote possibility that you might regret an introduction, then it might be best to make an excuse and decline politely.
Similarly, how well do you know the contact? Would you feel uncomfortable reaching out to the contact because you barely know the person or had an awkward exchange recently with the contact? Are you always reaching out to the same contact for introductions and may be reaching a saturation point? How much time do you think the contact has to cultivate a new relationship with the asker? Think about how your reaching out would be perceived by the contact. Again, it’s your reputation that will be affected by your initial outreach to the contact.
Finally, don’t forget to consider the positive effects a successful introduction would mean for you. A successful introduction can easily bolster and reaffirm your reputation as being a valuable resource. The asker would- of course- be grateful and it is an easy “give” for you. The contact could also be grateful because the asker may be a useful addition to the contact’s network, another easy “give” for you.
2. Consider the Why from the Asker
Now consider the “why.” Hopefully, the asker gave you a short summary of why she/he would like to meet X. Review the reason- does it make sense? Do you get a good sense for exactly what will be gained from the introduction or is the reason too vague to result in any concrete actions? Something such as “X’s experience in digital mobile health app development for hospital systems” is better than “X’s digital health experience.” The why needs to convince you that the introduction would be beneficial, ideally for both the asker and the contact. While it will be easy to convince you that the introduction would be beneficial to the asker, it may be more challenging to convince you how the contact would benefit.
If you are open to making the introduction, but believe that the “why” isn’t strong enough, tell the asker that she/he needs to revise it. Be direct and say that you aren’t convinced that the contact will agree to the introduction based upon the current “why.” If you have the time, make suggestions on how the summary could be improved, but again, this is the asker’s responsibility. Of course, if you don’t believe there is a strong reason for the introduction based on the why, then politely decline the asker’s request, e.g., “Sorry, I don’t actually know that person well enough to provide an introduction. Do you mind finding someone else?”.
3. Sending the Initial Request for an Introduction to the Contact
Now that you have agreed to be the connector, it’s time to test the waters with the contact. To prepare for the possibility that the contact will decline the introduction, it is best for the connector to initially reach out to the contact and gently inquire whether the contact would be open to the introduction. It’s important to not include the asker on this email because it prevents awkwardness and embarrassment should the contact decline the invitation.
The email should include the “why” summary from the asker - should just be a cut and paste job from the asker’s email. If appropriate, you might want to add your two cents - how the asker and contact have XYZ in common or in what context and how long you have known the asker. If the contact has a good relationship with you and trusts you, your personal insight into the asker will be appreciated as the contact contemplates whether to agree to the introduction. And finally, in closing, be sure to include an opportunity for the contact to say no without any awkwardness. Something simple such as “Would you be open to the introduction- no big deal if it isn’t a good time” is sufficient.
This email could also include something personal from you to the contact, inquiring about the contact’s vacation, or the latest update on your company, just to keep yourself connected to the contact. The email should not be too long, since it is simply a quick inquiry about the contact’s openness to an introduction.
Here is an example of the initial request for an introduction to the contact:
I am reaching out to see if you would be open to an introduction to a friend of mine, Eve. Eve is based in San Francisco, and similar to your experience a few years ago, Eve has recently left her 10+ year career in investment banking to pursue a new career path in impact investing/social finance. During her search, she noticed we were connected via LinkedIn and asked if I could facilitate an introduction to you. Eve is a smart, hard worker and a good person with whom I think you will enjoy connecting. While she was a very good banker, I’m not at all surprised to see her transitioning into something that is more meaningful to her. Please let me know if you are open to an introduction and to have a call or coffee with Eve if/when time permits.
After you have sent the email to the contact, you may want to email the asker to let her or him know you emailed the contact. In the email to the asker, include “feel free to remind me to follow up with the contact if you haven’t heard anything from me in 7-10 days.”
4. Sending the Formal Introduction
Once you receive the contact’s approval for the introduction, now is the time for you to write a formal email. Include the contact and asker in the To: line and include full names of both parties in the subject line.
Be concise and direct- provide names, titles, and something great about the asker and the contact. Complimenting both people provides background information and primes them to be proud of their accomplishments and perhaps more open to offer assistance. Your spiel helps make the connection on why the asker and contact should meet. Again, don’t overstate anyone’s abilities or accomplishments, but provide the context on how they could be helpful to each other.
Close the email with something such as “I hope you two will connect and find ways to help each other.”
Here is a template of a formal introduction request:
Intro
Contact,
Meet ASKER, who's a friend from HOW KNOW, who BACKGROUND, and is in LOCATION. Thought you'd enjoy talking as REASON FOR INTRO.
Asker,
Good seeing you WHEN. Hope things are going well. Meet RECIPIENT, my friend from HOW KNOW, who BACKGROUND, and is in LOCATION.
I'll leave it to you two from here to coordinate.
5. Now What?
Great job in being a connector; your role is done. Ideally, the asker and contact will reply with some dates/times to meet/chat. You should be removed from the email chain by either the contact or asker. After the meeting/call, hopefully the asker and/or the contact will update you how things went and thank you for setting up the introduction.
As part of the “give give give” mantra, don’t expect anything from the asker or the contact. Maybe they will return the favor, maybe they won’t. It doesn’t matter because the most important thing is that you built up your long-term relationship with the asker and the contact, which builds trust (T in TEA). As we have mentioned in the Collecting Challenges post, lasting relationships are built on trust, and by facilitating a useful connection, the asker and contact have increased their trust in you.
You are the Contact of the Introduction
1. Evaluate the Initial Request for an Introduction from the Connector
First, how well do you know the connector? Is the connector someone whom you know well and trust her/his opinion? You would probably agree to the introduction if the connector has been helpful in the past in a personal or professional capacity. Less likely to agree to the introduction if you have no real history with the connector, e.g., just met at a networking event. Trust is key and is the foundation for lasting relationships. If you don’t know and trust the connector, might be better to decline the invitation.
Second, how interested are you in meeting/talking to the asker? Does the reason provided by the asker/connector make sense? Consider doing a quick google search on the asker. Would this person add value to your network? From your standpoint, what are the benefits and drawbacks to agreeing to the introduction. While it seems counterintuitive to consider the disadvantages- after all, what happened to the “give, give, give” mantra- one should only give if you are in a position to give. For example, if you are hanging by a thread with your own responsibilities, now probably isn’t the best time to agree to be a mentor. By disadvantages, we are merely stating that you need to be a good place in order to give fully and freely. A partial give may not be helpful to anyone. Think about your current commitments and whether you have the time and attention for the introduction.
Related to the above, if you are going to agree to the introduction, then do your best to be helpful. You have a responsibility to do a good job. If you think you can’t be very helpful, or don’t have the time, then consider declining the introduction. It doesn’t help anyone to waste time if you don’t think the introduction could be helpful. So don’t feel compelled to automatically say yes.
If you do decline the introduction, be graceful and diplomatic about it. Phrases such as “timing is bad at the moment because of work deadlines” or “while I would love to help, I don’t believe I would be the best contact” are neutral and not offensive. If appropriate, think of an alternative suggestion for an introduction and if the connector is not familiar with that person, offer to make an introduction. Recommending someone else conveys to the connector (and the asker) that you are still trying to help where possible. It’s part of your give as the contact.
2. Replying to the Formal Introduction from the Connector
In many instances, after the formal introduction from the connector has been sent, the asker will reply first with suggestions on when to meet/call. But if you as the contact choose to reply first, then make it convenient for yourself. Would you prefer a call or an in-person meeting? When will the meeting/call occur? In your email response, recommend 2-3 times and dates for the meeting/call for the asker to choose from.
Thank the connector for the introduction and respect the connector’s time by moving the connector to the bcc: line to take the connector off the follow-up emails. Something such as “Thanks, Eric, for the introduction (moved you to bcc)” is sufficient.
3. In-Person Meeting or Call with the Asker
If you have an in-person meeting, it could be assumed that the asker will pay for coffee, lunch, etc. since the asker requested the introduction. However, if you are the more senior person, then it might be appropriate for you to pay, depending on the purpose of the meeting. But neither should be assumed so just play it by ear.
If the asker has a list of things to cover with you or ask of you, hopefully, it will be limited to 3 topics or asks (see previous post, You are the Asker). If the list of things is too vague or the ask is too broad, feel free to point it out to the asker. You wouldn’t have agreed to the introduction if you weren’t already primed to assist where possible. The ask needs to be specific enough where you can be confident you can actually help. For example, if the asker says “find me a job in social media marketing”; this ask is too broad and doesn’t permit you as the contact to take concrete steps to help the asker. Instead, an ask such as “could you connect me to someone in your digital marketing department so I can figure out how to leverage my copywriting and photography experience and apply it to social media marketing” is an easy yes for the contact. Don’t be afraid to only agree to something specific and focused. It permits you to help explicitly and ensures that you do your part by doing a good job. Agreeing to something vague may not pan out for you or the asker and doesn’t put you in the best light should your action not deliver tangible results.
Finally, don’t feel bad by not agreeing to help with all the asks from the asker. If you have no way to assist on a particular ask, be honest. Better to decline an ask than fail to accomplish it. After declining, you can discuss with the asker a different topic/ask where you have the ability or resources to help. Another scenario may be that you do not have the time to address all the asks, and you should not feel bad if you cannot help with everything. The asker should be understanding and appreciate any assistance you can provide.
4. Follow Up
In theory, the asker should offer to email you a follow-up list of things that you agreed to do. If the asker doesn’t, remind the asker to provide you with concise, bulleted reminders. Remind the asker to also include any relevant documentation to the email, e.g., resume, investor overview materials, etc. Having all the necessary information in one email makes it easy for you to forward as part of your follow up.
Although the asker will probably update the connector, you might want to also reach out to the connector to thank him/her for the introduction. It is nice to thank the connector for thinking of you, and also affirms your willingness to entertain introductions.
Conclusion and an Example of a Great Introduction
Networking should not be a chore, so keep it light and fun for the asker, the connector and the contact. Networking via email introductions is a great tool to use as long as everyone is respectful, efficient, and considerate.
And to sum it up, here is a recent example from Eric of an email introduction for a mutually beneficial business opportunity. Eric was the connector.
Emails from Asker to Connector:
Email from Asker to Connector Requesting Introduction to Contact:
Hi Eric,
I saw that you are connected to XY at Company XYZ. Given her extensive experience and awesome background, I’d love to talk with her to see how our companies could assist each other. Would you mind introducing us via email? If yes, I’ve included additional information below that you can simply forward to XY.
Thanks, AB
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hi XY,
Eric thought it could be beneficial to meet, given Company XYZ's commitment to pro bono, and the overlap with Company EFG’s mission to increase access to justice by helping maximize the ROI of programs.
I've heard great things about Company XYZ’s work with Organization X, as well as Organization Y, and was hoping to connect with you or your committee on an exploratory basis to understand if there might be value for Company XYZ regarding our management platform.
For background, I founded Company ABC to help legal teams (like O, P, and Q):
Capture all metrics and outcomes across the organization to determine ROI and impact
Decrease high administrative costs that have a negative impact
Boost participation and engagement by connecting all offices
If any of that resonates as being a priority, might you be available for a short call?
Sincerely, AB
Emails from Connector to Contact:
Initial Email from Connector to Contact:
Hi XY,
Hope you and your family are doing well. I am reaching out to see if you would be open to an introduction to a friend of mine, AB. AB is based in Chicago and has her own management firm targeting firms with pro bono committees. I know you are in NYC, and while AB’s firm’s clients are primarily in the midwest, , she is also looking to make connections in NYC, which is what made me think of you. I think she would be a potentially useful person to know, but I’ll let you tell me if you think this is an okay use of your time. I’ve included AB’s request for an introduction below.
Thanks, Eric
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hi XY,
Eric thought it could be beneficial to meet, given Company XYZ's commitment to pro bono, and the overlap with Company EFG’s mission to increase access to justice by helping maximize the ROI of programs.
I've heard great things about Company XYZ’s work with Organization X, as well as Organization Y, and was hoping to connect with you or your committee on an exploratory basis to understand if there might be value for Company XYZ regarding our management platform.
For background, I founded Company EFG to help legal teams (like O, P, and Q):
Capture all metrics and outcomes across the organization to determine ROI and impact
Decrease high administrative costs that have a negative impact
Boost participation and engagement by connecting all offices
If any of that resonates as being a priority, might you be available for a short call this week or next?
Sincerely, AB
Formal Email from Connector to Contact and Asker:
XY,
Thanks for talking to AB! She's great and lives in CHI so phone/email probably best. See info below.
AB,
XY is terrific; in NYC. She's not sure she's the right one but can likely connect you with the right person.
Best, Eric
Email from Asker to Contact and bcc: Connector:
Thank you so much for the introduction, Eric (moving to bcc), and great to meet you, XY!
I've heard great things about Company’s XYZ’s legal pro bono work, especially around X and Y, and love to get your perspective on their program and process to see if it's worth connecting with the pro bono team.
Would any of the below windows work to connect next week (times in EST)?
Wednesday, 3/14, between 11 AM and 5 PM
Thursday, 3/15, between 10 AM and 1:30 PM
Friday, 3/16, between 10 and 12:30 PM
What is the best number to reach you?
Looking forward, AB
Key words: email, introduction, asker, connector, contact